Thoughts from the Earl

December 23rd, 2005 · No Comments
by DavidThayer

I read somewhere that the holidays were encroaching. That was probably The Wall Street Journal. Encroaching on what? When confronted with conundrums I turn to the Earl. He’s an aspiring writer whose literary career is wobbly at best. For instance, he lost his cool and was dragged across the floor of a train station clinging to a literary agent’s expensive trousers. When the agent tried to shake him loose the Earl offered his manuscript in exchange for letting go. Needless to say that ploy was a total failure. In all the excitement the Earl had forgotten to enclose a SASE.

When he learned that I was guest blogging on Booksquare the Earl ran full page ads demanding equal time. Unfortunately the transit strike intervened. There are no wi-fi stations on the Brooklyn Bridge. However I can quote from his essay ‘Uberagents Love Me’ in the hopes of helping other writers with their travails. The Earl suggests, “when attending a writers conference always seize the opportunity to speak with agents and editors. I make use of a motorized golf cart. While actual collisions with attendees may cause rancor agents and editors are often more receptive as they regain consciousness, a kind of fugue state during which you may be mistaken for a loved one…”

This approach may not be for everyone. Fans in Northern California: the Earl will be appearing at Eddie’s Book Nook on the slopes of Mount Shasta. This is a make up date from last year when the event was snowed out. He’ll be reading from his potboiler Voltaire’s Miasma described by the Wellington Leg Intelligencer as ‘gripping.’ And, yes, all sales are final.

File Under: Square Pegs