We are not going to name names, but we know some publishers, music labels, and studios who engage in a little game. The rules are simple:
- Locate a review of your latest masterpiece.
- Run around the house/office, trying to find your sharpest scissors.
- Sit down in a comfortable chair and read the review. Do not read for context as it is an unnecessary use of brain cells.
- Carefully — this is why the scissors must be sharp — cut out words and phrases that reflect you and/or your work in glowing terms.
- Put said words and phrases into something that is almost-but-not-quite a sentence.
- Place the almost-but-not-quite sentence on the product covers, posters, letters to your mother, and funny articles for your alumni newsletter.
- Wait for lawsuit from cranky reviewer (especially if you deserve it as payback for previous bad behavior)
- Repeat.
And yes, we feel Alex Beam’s pain.
