Booksquare

We are, by nature, pacifistic. It’s that lazy thing we suffer from. So it’s surprising and painful to discover we’re feeling oozy, icky hatred. Not the hot, passionate kind. This is more the type that will spread and fester. Yes, thanks to a helpful friend, we have finally read an author interview that pisses us off in an ugly way. And we have hours to go before we can drink. A few choice quotes as a preview:

They say everyone has at least one book inside them. But is it true? Could we all turn our hands to writing best sellers for a living?

And:

‘I do think everybody has a book in them, I really believe that,’ says Claudia, who describes her genre as ‘chick lit’. ‘I think the hardest thing is starting. Everybody’s certainly got enough experience. You can have the most humdrum job in the world, but if you’ve got family or you’ve ever been in love or worked in an office, you’ve got enough experience to write a book. You don’t have to have a mad life or incredible experiences. You just need to be able to make different scenarios interesting.’

Finally:

And writing doesn’t have to be a lifelong dream. A writer on OK! for four years, Claudia never had a burning ambition to pen a novel. However, she’d always fancied the lifestyle that went with it. She says: ‘I had this vision of me getting up at 9am, wafting around in my pyjamas until midday then taking to the chaise-long to write a few hundred words or so.’

Claudia offers helpful advice to set you on the path to bestsellerdom. You don’t need to read her tips. Trust us. You’ll do fine on your own.

• How to write a best seller